Having Fun with Boring Stuff

One of the challenges of being an adult is learning to tolerate things you just don’t like. You know, when your husband drags you to a football game (yawn), or your child wants to play Mommy-is-a-Robot for two hours (scream), or maybe your best friend wants to watch the newest Hallmark movie…again (sigh). Now none of these things are wicked or harmful…but you just don’t like them. Now what?

You have three choices: refuse to do the thing, do the thing unwillingly, or do the thing with a joyful attitude.

Clearly, you (and everyone else) will enjoy the activity more if you are happy about it. You can infuse life and joy into a situation that otherwise you would have breathed discontent and unhappiness into. You might not think so, but you have the ability to bring down the spirits of everyone around you. Your attitude is a very powerful thing.

But how?

1. Don’t lie about your preference.

I truly hope you do not take this post to mean that you should fake liking something so that everyone else feels better, because this is not my intention.  If you have a genuine issue with something (it’s sinful, harmful, bad example), state your argument and withdraw if necessary. Most of the time, though, that isn’t the reason. Usually, we get upset simply because we do not get our way. Having said that, it is not wrong to have preferences. If you don’t like spinach, it is OK to avoid the spinach casserole at the church potluck. If you don’t like bowling, it is OK to suggest another activity. But please don’t sit around complaining about it! If you are asked your preference, and are then overruled by the leader/majority- deal with it. This is not 1st grade where we throw tantrums because we didn’t get the purple glue in art class!

2. Think about why you dislike “it”.

So you were overruled, and you have to do “the thing”.  Before we can proceed to learning to enjoy it, we must discover why you DON’T enjoy it. Judge yourself. Do you dislike ice-skating because you don’t want to embarrass yourself falling? (pride) Do you hate having company over because you are afraid they will find fault with you? (insecurity) Do you dislike football because your husband spends time watching it instead of being with you? (jealousy) There are a million possible scenarios here, but it all boils down to this: why is it a problem? You may find it as simple a reason as your childhood friends laughed at you while skating, or as complicated as reason as your dad watching football before he abused you- but whatever the reason, it must be addressed. Pray about it, and ask God to show you how to deal with it. If it is serious enough of an issue, seek counsel: but do NOT hide your problem under “I just don’t like doing that.”

3. Realize you probably won’t be the best.

So hopefully, by this point, you have figured out why you don’t like “it”, and dealt with the root issue. Now we are ready to try “it” with an open mind…but, wait.

I’m not as good at this as _____. You can fill in the blank. Example: My husband loves to go bowling, but I have a chronic wrist problem that makes it painful to bowl with my dominant hand. Once I have conquered the fear of pain/embarrassment, I go bowling and quickly realize… that I am horrible. Forced to bowl left-handed, I always score the lowest (even with the rails up;). What now? I can make all sorts of excuses, play the pity-me card, refuse to bowl, and make my husband feel guilty for bringing me in the first place- or I can choose to be happy with my score. I can choose to accept the fact that I will never be as good as he is (he was in a bowling league in high school), and just enjoy the game and the company. I can choose to laugh at every gutter ball I throw, and I can act like I won the Olympics when I hit a pin. So can you. You can choose to be happy with your best. Comparing yourself to the best player/best cook/best singer will not help anyone, least of all yourself. Take joy from your small victories, not unhappiness from your small failures.

4. Have fun.

At this point, you are in a good mood. You might not be particularly interested in what is going on, but you are happy to be involved. Now let’s take it to the next level. Don’t just tolerate, enjoy! Laugh at the corny jokes, and tell some of your own. Build a house of blocks, and knock it down yourself. Play Monopoly and make up some special family rules that involve tickling and ice cream. Cherish the time you have with your friends and family. Your involvement in their favorite thing may mean the world to them. Make the impression even better by making joy-filled, loving memories. You may even find that you start to like “it”! Could it really hurt that much to try?

Good luck!

-Beth