How to Show Hospitality

Our previous post “Hospitality as a Ministry” explained the reasons behind ministering to people through food and service, aka “having people over”- this post will explain the ‘how to’ parts of it. Hospitality is becoming a lost art. Many people have only a vague idea about the importance of putting forks in the right spot and something about not slurping the soup. Don’t worry…this is not an etiquette lesson. If you would like to know the formal way to set tables and engrave invitations for your formal dinner, then there are many internet resources for that. I want to share some practical ways for you AND your company to have a good time in an informal setting.

Remember your purpose.

The goal of hospitality is to make the other person(s) feel comfortable and relaxed; especially if you are trying to form a relationship with them. This means that you may have to put your own preferences and favorite ways of doing things aside to minister to your guest. Your goal is not to impress them with your showroom house, gourmet cooking, perfect children, or pedigreed pets. Your goal is to show God’s love and fellowship in a tangible way.

2. Don’t try for perfection.

Too many people have this idea that their houses have to be perfect in order to entertain company. THIS IS NOT TRUE! Of course, you should do your best. Of course, you should clean the bathroom. Of course, you should clear the kids’ toys off the couch. But you must let go of the idea that your house has to look like something off of TV! Stop obsessing about, ‘But what will my guest think of me?’ Just remember, the people who matter won’t care, and the people who care don’t matter. Honestly, most people won’t notice that cobweb in the corner, or that you didn’t dust the fan. They won’t. Really.

3. Keep the food simple.

Do NOT, I repeat, do NOT try to fix a gourmet meal for your guests. You will be stressed out, your guests will feel bad that you made so much effort for them, and it might not even taste good! Go with something simple that you have made before (successfully) and that is inexpensive. The internet has plenty of recipes for casseroles, crock pot meals, and soups that can be made on a tight schedule for under $10. Remember, your goal is not to impress your guests, but to feed them.

Try to keep in mind your guests’ food preferences. Do they have any food allergies? Are they on a specific diet? Is there a dish they absolutely hate? Of course, you might not be able to accommodate everything, but your guests will appreciate the effort. Making a THM, Keto, or gluten-free meal is not as hard as it seems, especially considering how much more comfortable your company will feel. If children are involved, keep in mind that they may be picky. Having something like mac and cheese available will help ease tensions.

If you truly cannot cook (and by this, I mean that you burn water) and you are using this as an excuse not to show hospitality, I have a challenge for you. Watch some youtube videos, ask people you know who cook, buy a cookbook, take a class; and learn how to make at least one meal. In the meantime, order pizza!

4. Be flexible.

Nothing ever goes as expected…something is always going to “go wrong”. Be mentally prepared to change plans as needed. Oftentimes, hospitality is last minute and you can be prepared by simple forethought. Always have a frozen meal in the freezer, or Hamburger Helper in the pantry. Keep a container of lemonade mix and bottled water handy, and stock up on paper products. If your friends have kids, keep a playpen and a few age-appropriate toys/snacks around for last-minute visits. Provide play areas whenever possible. Have an alternate plan for pets such as a kennel or back room in case they have trouble with your visitors. But most importantly, don’t allow yourself to be anxious if everything isn’t perfect. Every change in plans is a chance to show graciousness: especially if your guests are unbelievers.

5. Be thoughtful.

What do your visitors really need? Think about their week, their schedules, their stress level. If you aren’t sure, have a couple plans ready: a board/card game, a movie for the kids, time outside, or coffee and dessert. Consider what they are accustomed to. If they are a fast food every night kind of family, try to stick to basic foods that they are familiar with. Schedule around nap times and bed times or provide somewhere for kids to lay down. Remove delicate items or place out of reach so that parents aren’t stressed about accidental breakage. Consider letting them keep on their shoes if they aren’t used to removing them. Is there a toy your child will not share? Place it in an inaccessible place to avoid conflict. Really think hard about what will help make the visit go as smoothly as possible.

6. Share the load.

If you have a busy schedule or a tight budget, don’t be embarrassed to ask your guests to bring something. They may actually appreciate the chance to contribute! Don’t forget: being invited over may be just a strange to them as inviting them is to you. Being able to help will help dispel feelings of awkwardness. So what should you ask them to bring? NOTHING VITAL TO THE MEETING- or you will be stressed out that they will forget. A dessert, bread, drinks, or a game all work well; and if it gets forgotten, everything is still fine. Once you are (both) comfortable with this “hospitality” thing, then try potluck or picnic style meals when it works well for both parties.

7. Do it again.

The temptation is to have one friend over, breathe a sigh of relief, and then isolate for 6 months. Don’t give in to that! Write a list of who you want to have over: friends, people from church, neighbors, family, co-workers. Start small: one person/family per month. Then as your confidence grows, add more as your schedule allows. Remember your goal is to create relationships that will bring you both closer to Christ; so view it as a ministry!

How to Create Sunday School Packets

During this time of quarantines and shutdowns, many of you are probably wondering how you can keep in touch with your Sunday School students. Don’t worry; you have options! We have many digital options: call/text your students, create a YouTube video, or use a live streaming service to teach your class. Still, nothing beats something physical to put in your students’ hands! Here are some ideas to create a fantastic and relevant goody bag for your class.

The following steps are intended to help you prepare for just one class. If you are preparing for multiple classes, just repeat the steps for each class. By using things around the church/house, you should be able to create packets for about $.50 each. Totally doable!

1.Decide your theme.

What is your lesson about? Choose a color or design that represents the point you are trying to get across and use it through out your packet. (Example: your lesson is about prayer. Incorporate clip art of praying hands throughout.) Or use something totally unrelated, but cute. (owls, race cars, etc.) This will help tie everything together. Be sure that you include some sort of printout that explains the passage that you are teaching in such a way that parents can easily read it to their children without having to study themselves.

2. Gather your items.

If you are doing this for a large group, organization is key. You will be surprised how much you already have laying around! The kids won’t know that the candy is leftover from the last bus promotions; you weren’t going to use those leftover popcorn bags from VBS anyways. Be creative! If expense is a concern, ask people to help you gather items. If one person gets crayons, one person grabs juice boxes, and another takes care of printing worksheets, no one person will be burdened with the expense.

Here are some ideas of what to include: snack, candy, crayons/pens, small toy, memory verse card, tract, bookmark, easy craft, hand sanitizer, worksheets, coloring pages, and personal notes.

3. Personalize.

This is where you can have some fun! The internet has all sorts of resources that you can take advantage of, or you can create your own. Your kindergarten class would love a simple coloring sheet- older children might enjoy a word search, crossword puzzle, or fill-in-the-blank. Teens can get involved too- try a Bible verse hunt or questions about a section of text. Have a little extra time? Throw in a small personal note: believe me, they will appreciate the thought! Any little thing you can do to make it unique for each child will make an impact. Do you know that one kid doesn’t like chocolate? Throw in a sour candy instead. Did that one parent ask you not to feed their child sugar? Add an apple instead of a snack cake. Think about what your students like- and what you would want YOUR kids to have.

4. Distribute.

Put all your items in some sort of bag and attach a label of some kind (or write on the bag). Then drive to your students’ houses and drop them off. Depending on your church’s policy, you can either visit with your student or just leave it on the doorstep for them to find. Make sure you leave a tract or something similar so that they will know who it is from.

There! You’re done! Wasn’t that fun? Plus, your students will never forget the effort you put forth to connect with them during this crazy time!

For help finding worksheets or coloring pages, go to the Contact page and send us an email. We would love to help you. Good luck!

Avoiding a Heart Attack

Avoiding a Heart Attack: Or how to have a long term ministry without burning out

How do you stay in a ministry 5, 10, 15, 20+ years?

What keeps you from burning out or just going through the motions all the time? I am sure that in the whole world there are tons of reasons, but I picked some I thought were more common and could extend to cover other possible reasons.

First, let me be clear that I do not think it is God’s will that when we start in a specific ministry we will never change. I will say emphatically that if you are a child of God you should have a ministry or several ministries to aid the local New Testament church, no matter where you attend or what stage of life you are in currently.

We will have been at our church for 19 years this October and I would love to say I never wanted to move or just give up on some of my ministries. I would love to say that I have always done my best or been the best… but that isn’t true. It is out of my struggle I will attempt to give you some helps to help you be aware on your way. At the end of the lesson I will give you some questions to ask yourself before changing or quitting a ministry, so read all the way through!

Be aware of: Family history.

Were you raised by parents that were not exactly stable? Did they change home, jobs, friends and churches often? Did you sense a kind of vibe before the move or change that they had become discontent with whatever it was?

I did. My mom was in and out of marriages, jobs, friends, homes; you name it, and she became bored or disgruntled with it at some point.

While leaving some things is not necessarily a sin, at a certain point, it does show a lack of maturity and the ability to hold on to long term things. If we are raised like this, we often have these tendencies. We must stop the cycle and know there can be some long term things in your life: but it takes work. Insecurity can also play a large role in this, too.

So whether you clean the church, work in the nursery, teach Sunday School or any of the other ministries in the church. Be in it for the long haul and only change after totally thinking it through and not just because you are tired.

James 1:8 “A double minded man is unstable in all his ways.”

Pro 24:2 For their heart studieth destruction, and their lips talk of mischief.

Pro 24:3-4 Through wisdom is an house builded; and by understanding it is established: And by knowledge shall the chambers be filled with all precious and pleasant riches

Be aware of: Inactivity

I see this as a huge issue that gets people all the time! For example: You have been teaching a while, you get comfortable with it, and -boom- all the sudden your class attendance drops or starts misbehaving or looses its attention span. Suzie is giving you a hard time and your favorite, Tina, moved away. You start arriving later and later to class. You never make time to visit. Your Sunday school board has been the same for 4 months, etc, etc!!!!

Sound Familiar?

You finally know what you are doing, but everything is going wrong! You have become inactive. You no longer need 2hrs to study for your class because you have taught this lesson before. But instead of still using the amount of time you did when you were hungry to learn and do your best, you just slide on what you know. You have lost your get up and go. I find when I get in these spots I have to push myself to go the extra mile. Do the finishing touches. Google to learn how to do something better. Look for new fun illustrations.

Find a way to do the extra things so you can take pride in your work. When we work for Jesus we should do our best. Brainstorm! Children church worker, choir member, janitor, secretary, associate, water cup fillers, laywoman: find a way to do it better!

Pro 6:6-10 Go to the ant, thou sluggard; consider her ways, and be wise: Which having no guide, overseer, or ruler, Provideth her meat in the summer, and gathereth her food in the harvest. How long wilt thou sleep, O sluggard? when wilt thou arise out of thy sleep? Yet a little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the hands to sleep.”

Be aware of: Stress

This can be anything that causes a distraction, whether it be Family, Finances, or Physical Health. When you are dealing with these things, quitting is sometimes is the worst thing you can do. Why? Because the Bible teaches the principle that by helping others we help ourselves. Your ministry -if done right- can be an relief for the stress you have to battle! Quitting in reaction to stress is never the answer. Remember why you are serving in the first place. Do you have unrealistic fantasy expectations for your ministry?

Pro 14:1 Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the Foolish plucketh it down with her hands.”

Be aware of: Bad Habits

I must state the obvious fact that sin does not only cause pain to you but to those around you. Even worse, it will bring shame to the name of Christ when found out.

Guard and protect your life from sin! Guard against every sin of the mind and in deed.

James 1:19-22 “Wherefore, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath: For the wrath of man worketh not the righteousness of God. Wherefore lay apart all filthiness and superfluity of naughtiness, and receive with meekness the engrafted word, which is able to save your souls. But be ye doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving your own selves.”

What I want to focus on here is the danger of never striving to improve yourself as a Christian. We get lazy! How easy it is to say, ‘That’s just how I am’, and give free reign to our besetting sin. No matter how mature you are as a Christian, there is always something that you can improve on.

Pick a fruit of the Spirit to work on for a week, and I promise you won’t feel perfect anymore! You will start to re-notice the flaws in your character, and hopefully feel compelled to work on them.

Be aware of: Changes in your abilities

One day you will find for whatever reason that you can no longer do what you once did. It may come as a sudden shock, or it may sneak up on you gradually, but now you no longer can physically do what you used to.

Maybe when you were younger, you could endure the heat/cold no problem, but now you just can’t. Maybe a disease has crippled you early in life, and it’s hard to do even simple tasks. Maybe an injury has put you on the sidelines for a while, or even permanently.

Whatever your situation, find SOMETHING you can do. Unless you are paralyzed from the neck down, there is something you can do- and even then, you can be a prayer warrior! Don’t find an excuse. Find new ministries or ways to be a blessing to those who fill your shoes.

Deu 32:29 O that they were wise, that they understood this, that they would consider their latter end!

Eph 6:12-13 For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places. Wherefore take unto you the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand.

So before you throw in the towel, take this pop quiz.

Questions to ask before quitting or changing ministries:

1. Why are you thinking of quitting?

2. Is this a Pastor-initiated/promoted change?

3. Is it to enable you to start a new ministry?

4. Is there someone willing and able to take your place?

5. Are you quitting because you can’t get along with someone?

6. Can you still physically do the job properly?

7. Are the issues you’re quitting over bigger than the need for the ministry?

8. Have you made a genuine effort to solve any of the issues?

Hospitality as a Ministry

I am so humbled that Mrs. Rasbeary would ask me to write an article for her blog! There is nothing like having friends in the ministry that just “get you,” and that is the friendship that we have shared with the Rasbearys over the past several years. Like the Rasbearys, we are church planters in Texas. My husband and I met in Bible college, and after serving as a youth pastor for a year in Maryland, we moved back to my husband’s home church, Beeville Baptist Church in Beeville, TX. In 2006, after 6 months of deputation and some miraculous, God-ordained circumstances, my husband became the first pastor of Heritage Baptist Church in Corpus Christi. We have been so honored to serve there for the past 12 ½ years, and thank God every day that He has chosen to use us!

One of the biggest aspects of a young, growing thriving church is outreach. From day one, soul winning and discipleship has been the main focus of our ministry. As the pastor’s wife, my avenue of outreach has also included hospitality. The word hospitality is used 4 times in the New Testament and it comes from the Greek word philozenia that means “love for strangers”. Yikes! As an introvert, that is so convicting! Sure, I love my husband, my kids, and my extended family. I love my Christian brothers and sisters at a church that shares the same beliefs and same interests that I have… but strangers!?! I think all of us as moms have at some point told our kids not to even TALK to strangers, yet the Bible is telling us to LOVE strangers. This love is going to come out in visible, service-driven ways; ways that point strangers- not to us, our lovely house, great cooking or fun personalities- but to Christ, and the difference that He makes in our lives and homes.

What are some ways we can show hospitality? There are so many different ways, but I wanted to share just a few ideas that we personally have used over the years to show hospitality {love to strangers} in our ministry. This is certainly not an exhaustive list, but I’m always looking for new and fun ideas and wanted to share some of my favorites!

1. Take something homemade to guests. We try to touch each person that walks through the doors of our church with some avenue of hospitality. Since we first came to Corpus Christi, we have spent our Tuesday evenings taking first-time visitors a loaf of homemade cinnamon swirl bread. It is a super easy recipe that uses ingredients I always have on hand. We have done a Starbucks copycat lemon loaf recipe that is also yummy. Here are the recipes if anyone is interested!

https://www.allrecipes.com/recipe/23376/cinnamon-swirl-bread/

CopyCat Starbucks Lemon Loaf

2. Host people in your home. We do this most often through Sunday Evening fellowships. There is no better way to get to know people than by having them in your home! Our favorite time to have people over is on Sunday evenings right after the service. It gets visitors back in church for our evening service, and is a great way to continue the fellowship that takes place after church in a more comfortable environment. We plan something simple that can be made ahead of time or kept warm in a Crock-Pot like tacos, chili, or soup and sandwiches. Don’t forget dessert! Everyone pitches in on Sunday afternoons to spiffy up the house and prepare food. Our three boys love having company. (That may have something to do with the dessert!) Again, the purpose of this is not to have the same group of people over to have fun. There is definitely a time for that, but we try to focus on ministry when we have visitors over. During this time we ask questions, listen, encourage, and just love and serve. Someone once said, “People won’t care how much you know, until they know how much you care.”

3. Take meals to those in need. Our church has always been great about serving others through taking meals. We do this for those that have a health need, a new baby, or other circumstances where they just need some encouragement. We organize this through our adult Bible classes. When we share prayer requests in these classes, everyone then has a tangible way to care for those in their age group. Something that has made this so much easier recently is the takethemameal.com website. It is completely free and has streamlined communication that enables us to be more organized.

4. Show care and concern through faithful prayer and visible ways. The MOST important way that we can show love to others is by praying for them. Having a current prayer list that you can pray through everyday is a must. It means so much to be able to say to someone, “I prayed for you this morning!” Interceding in prayer is most certainly a vital way to show love to fellow Christians and strangers. But many times when I’m praying for someone else’s need or burden, the Holy Spirit will prompt me to do something for them. I try to follow through with these promptings as much as possible in order to show love in a tangible way. A card in the mail, an encouraging text, a fast food meal dropped off at their door, a drink from Starbucks or Sonic, a meal sent through Uber Eats or Door Dash, a pizza delivered to their door, a favorite candy or pint of ice cream . . . there are so many ways to show love in a tangible way! I would LOVE to hear what ideas you have in the comments section!

When is the last time you have loved a stranger? If we want to be able to reach the lost, as well as encourage the saved that God brings along our path of life, and see our churches have impactful ministries, then we will have to learn to show hospitality. I pray that this article will begin giving you some ideas to grow in this area and see how God can bless it as you serve Him!

~by Aimee Atwood~

Telling God No

We hope you enjoy this devotion by Patty Larson!

I don’t know about you, but I’m a talker. I love to sit and talk with my family and friends. I love to hear stories from others and share stories from my past. If you are ever with me and find me very quiet, I’m either super tired or I’ve been told to “hush!”😅

Do you converse with God throughout the day? God and I seem to have a continual dialogue, throughout each day and often in the night.

I must admit that there are times I argue with God. Not nearly as much as I used to, but I still do from time to time. I’ve learned that quite often when I don’t understand “why” or “how”, God has a plan and He knows and wants what is best for me.

One particular arguments with God several years ago taught me quite the lesson! I was shopping with a friend named Deana. We would often travel to Tyler from where we lived in Kilgore, TX and shop until we dropped. Of course, while we were there it was imperative that we either stop and eat at Cracker Barrel or Chick-fil-A. At the time we didn’t have either of these in or near our town.

On this particular day, we decided to visit the Chick-fil-A drive-through, so we could have more time to shop. God spoke to me very clearly to pay for Deana’s lunch. I argued with God all the way there. I was sure to remind him that my husband and I were raising and feeding seven children. At that time, Deana had none. If anything, she should be buying my lunch. Looking back now, I’m ashamed of my attitude. My thinking was that if I bought her lunch and mine, then I would not have a lot left of the $30.00 shipping money I’d brought along for the day. How dare God ask me to do such a thing. I flat out told Him “no!”

Deana pulled the car up to the menu board and I basically snubbed my nose at God and ignored what He had told me to do. I told Deana to go ahead and order hers and then we’d order mine as a separate order.

Deana placed her order and you won’t believe what we heard next!! The lady taking her order informed her that she was their 100th customer for the day and her lunch would be free!! I couldn’t believe it. Nothing like an “I told you so” from God.

If I had listened and obeyed, we both would have had a free lunch and I could have spent the entire $30.00 on shopping. Deana got a free lunch, regardless. God took care of her need. He would have taken care of mine if only I had listened.

I was reminded of Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end.”

God didn’t want to “take” from me. He had a blessing in store for me- well, actually two blessings. The blessing of giving to my friend by paying for her lunch, as well as the blessing of having a free lunch and more money with which to shop.

This seems like such a small, insignificant incident, but it taught me a great lesson. I haven’t reached the apex of trusting and obeying God, but I’ve learned through experiences, like the one mentioned above, that He cares for me and has a better plan than I could ever dream up.

Next time God speaks to you, don’t ignore Him. Don’t fight with Him. Do as He bids you do, and you will be blessed beyond measure!

Make a Joyful Noise

When I think of a joyful noise, I imagine an animated person unashamedly showing their deep emotional love and excitement for someone or something they love. While that certainly a lot of adjectives to use in one sentence, I feel that is how complicated joyful people are. We see this in sports, entertainment, hobbies, money making endeavors and for people even in a religious setting. What I want to discuss today is how we can become a joyful person making a joyful noise in our own unique way.

1 “Make a joyful noise unto the Lord, all ye lands. “

2. “Serve the Lord with gladness: come before his presence with singing. “

3. “Know ye that the Lord he is God: it is he that hath made us, and not we ourselves; we are his people, and the sheep of his pasture. “

4. “Enter into his gates with thanksgiving, and into his courts with praise: be thankful unto him, and bless his name.”

5. “For the Lord is good; his mercy is everlasting; and his truth endureth to all generations.”

Psalms 100:1-5 KJV

These five verse, are packed with everything we need to get a start on a joyful noise type of life. First it tells us what to do and second it tells us why.

The first two thing we are told are to make a joyful noise and to serve the Lord with gladness. I don’t think this is a coincidence that serving is connected to joy. Generally, the biggest factor in a lack of joy is selfish living. Serving requires self-denial. It also tells us what type of attitude to obtain, an attitude of gratitude. Somedays are hard to serve in gladness but as we continue in this chapter, we as believers see the reason we can have this gladness and true joy. If you notice that no one gets a pass.

Psalms 100:1 KJV “Make a joyful noise unto the Lord, all ye lands.”

I’m pretty sure God is giving this instruction to all of the world not just believers. How much more should we as Christians obey? I would submit to you we should be all the more joyful.

The next two commands are to approach him and others with thankfulness and praises.

4. “Enter into his gates with thanksgiving, and into his courts with praise: be thankful unto him, and bless his name.”

Being thankful and praising God is important, but I read into this a little more.

When verse 4 says,

“Enter into his gates with thanksgiving, and into his courts with praise:”,

I believe this is praise and thanksgiving of our family, friends, fellow believers, and those in our lives because the rest of the verse tells us ,” be thankful unto him, and bless his name.”

I have a passage that backs that theory up.

Matthew 22:36-40 KJV

“Master, which is the great commandment in the law? Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets.”

I truly believe God not only wants our praise and thanks giving for himself but to share it with those around us as well! I will confess this is not my personal strong point and have had to stop often in my life and give myself a thankfulness tune up. We will talk more about this at the end so right here I am going to stop and go on to the why of these commands and then I will wrap it up in some practical ” hows” we can obey this command with greater success.

First, we are His creation and He cares for us personally. This is so big! Why do we feel hopeless and lack joy? Is it because we are lonely or because we are in a bad place or don’t know how a bad situation is going to end? In our uncertainty we forget about or don’t feel his presence but as the good shepherd He is in control. We know he cares. Psalms 100:3 KJV

3. “Know ye that the Lord he is God: it is he that hath made us, and not we ourselves; we are his people, and the sheep of his pasture.”

Secondly, the Scripture says “For the Lord is good;” not only does He care for his creation, but He is good to us, too!

Third “his mercy is everlasting; ” Really, His mercy never ends! How wonderful is that since we keep messing up and needing mercy! That should get a joyful noise out of you!

Lastly, it says “his truth endureth to all generations.” That gives us hope that the hope He gives, I can share with the youngest child and the oldest grandma! In every time in my life I can cling to this hope that truth of God never changes. The same hope and truth that carried the martyrs to heaven will uplift us in every situation. I have never faced being a martyr, but if I did, the same truths would apply to me! Does anyone feel a song in their heart yet?

Now we have the what’s and why’s out of the way, let’s get to some ‘how-to’s. This list is certainly not exhaustive, but if you’re like me and have to do these types of things on purpose you will appreciate a list. I tend to get caught up in me and mine and must put time into my schedule for purposeful service, thanksgiving and praise for God and man.

Let me tell you a story that has inspired me.

Joseph Scrivens, author of “What a Friend We Have in Jesus”, would be one of many examples of gratefulness in extreme circumstances. His first tragedy began the day before his wedding. His wife drowned in a terrible accident. Struggling with this loss, he poured himself into others by giving money, mending homes and helping anyone he could. He then received a letter telling him that his mother was ill. However, because he gave all his money away to others he had no money to travel to see her. During this time, Scrivens wrote the poem that he called “Pray without Ceasing”, and we call “What a Friend We Have in Jesus”. He sent this to his sick mother. He found love again later on, and was to be wed shortly after his 40^th birthday; but she died of tuberculosis before they could be married. With new pain, he again plunged into the service of others; becoming quite known for generosity- even becoming a traveling preacher. Tragedy ended Joseph’s life when he drowned in a stream. Yet despite it all, he made a joyful noise that has lasted through the ages.

Do you want that kind of joy? Start putting some of these practical things in action and see the transformation God can make in your heart.

1. Thank God first

Start (or re-start) a thankfulness journal that may include the following:

People and things you are thankful

Kind deeds done on your behalf that God sent your way. (You can use this as a reference in your thankfulness to man category later.)

Don’t forget intangible blessings (protection from the unseen)

Remember God’s mercies toward you.

Express appreciation for truths that have made a recent impact on you.

Try experimenting with different forms of expressing your thankfulness to God. Poems, letters, lists and even art.

2. Serve God First in His Church

Soul-winning, nursery, cleaning- basically find something you can do to be a blessing. Do it all the time. Be faithful. Some of the suggestions in being thankful for and serving others below will ultimately be serving God also.

Ideas for serving and being thankful for your fellow man:

Watch for people who are faithful, steady or consistent in any thing they do- then say something.

Remember people’s special days.

Write cards or notes to someone mentioning something a person did that you were impressed by. Go the extra mile by mailing it.

Send texts with words of praise or encouragement.

Buy small gifts or bake things.

Publicly recognize others’ good deeds if the opportunity arises.

Pray for people, and tell them you are praying. Pray with them!

Hot Water

I am in hot water with Beth because I am not getting my half of the job done. We are supposed to be sharing equally but, like I confessed, writing is way harder for me than talking. So because Beth is such an encouragement & blessing to me, I am going to post to hold up my end of the bargain. The article is something I wrote almost 2 years ago for my friend Amy Sapp’s blog, entitled “Who cares for the Pastor?”

Here’s the link: Helpers of Joy

We have a wonderful church and this month for Pastor’s Wife appreciation month (yep that’s a thing), I have had several ladies give me gifts. I am so touched and encouraged. So remember your Pastor’s wife, if only a card, email or text. Who knows, you might both get a blessing!

Look for articles soon from the speakers of this year’s Ladies Retreat!

Loretta Walker

Jane Grafton

Elisabeth Ogdie

Patti Larson

Aimee Atwood

Things I Wish I’d Known: Self-hate is NOT Humility

Humility. This is a trait that many people-Christian or not- desire, yet few seem to find it. It is the opposite of arrogance, and very often misunderstood.

The Bible commands us to humble ourselves before God, and to each other. Blessing are promised to every one who obeys…and who doesn’t want God’s blessing! Yet somehow it is rare to know someone you could characterize as truly humble. Why is this? I believe it is because we don’t really know what humility is.

1. What Humility is NOT

A. Humility is NOT an absence of pride.

We instinctively shudder at the word “pride” as Christians, because we know that it is at the root of 33% all sin. (The lust of the flesh, lust of the eyes, and the pride of life are the temptations to sin according to 1 John 2.) However, there is a healthy pride that is acceptable. This would be the content regard for an action or person that gives satisfaction or joy. For example, it is not wrong to be satisfied with a job well done or with your child’s accomplishment. We naturally crave success and accomplishment. We desire a purpose- a way to make a difference in our world- a way to please God. As I will explain more fully later, what we want to avoid is conceit.

B. Humility is NOT timidity.

Although they probably don’t realize it, many people subconsciously think that to be humble, you must be introverted, shy, quiet, or a follower. This is NOT true. There is nothing wrong with being introverted, shy, quiet, or a follower but there is also nothing wrong with being extroverted, outgoing, loud, or a leader! God has made each of us different: we can’t all be the leader any more than we can all be the followers. So don’t automatically assume that because someone is timid that they are humble: the words are not synonymous.

3. Humility is NOT self-hate.

Somehow we have the idea that the way to be humble is to beat ourselves down and tell ourselves we can’t do anything. Example: I realize that I am growing conceited about piano playing. So I tell myself that I am not as good as I think I am, that others are better than me, that other people are lying when they say I do well. While this is might succeed in making me sad, this does not succeed in making me humble. God made who I am, and doesn’t intend for me to be ashamed about it. I am convinced that many people have “low self-esteem” not because other people are bullying them, but because they are bullying themselves! God does not want us to live defeated! He wants us to live abundantly through Christ.

So then what is humility? I’m glad you asked.

1. What Humility IS…

A. Humility IS accepting who you are.

Each one of us is different: different talents, abilities, experiences, families… and the list goes on and on. Some of us are musical, some are artistic, some are organizers, some are teachers, some are physically beautiful, some are leaders: but none of us are all of the above. Humility is accepting your abilities and disabilities with equal grace. You don’t have to be ashamed or embarrassed about yourself! God gave that talent to you to honor Him with. You can be confident in who God made you. He makes no mistakes!

B. Humility IS accepting who Christ is.

Humbling ourselves before God should not be hard…yet it is. This is because we have a tendency to become conceited about the blessings He has given us, as if we were responsible! Christ is deserving of all our praise, honor, and worship. Anything that we are and have is from Him and through Him. Left to our own devices, we would be in hell RIGHT NOW. When we realize how wicked and deprived our own hearts are, then we can understand the love that God showed to us, and humility will become natural.

C. Humility IS the opposite of conceit.

No one likes an arrogant, conceited, prideful person. The person who is always right, who can’t be corrected, who stares in the mirror, who puts others down, who is rude to cashiers and waiters, who is racist, who looks down their nose at every other person they meet: this is the person we avoid whenever possible. The definition of conceit is “too much pride in oneself, one’s abilities, or one’s accomplishments.” A conceited person is not just proud of her paint job in the church nursery, she also feels that

D. Humility IS beautiful.

Nothing is more beautiful than a woman who is comfortable in her own skin. You can pile on the makeup and trendy clothes and anti-aging serum all you want, but if you aren’t beautiful inside, it will be quickly seen through. When you accept who you are and who Christ is, the joy will flood your soul! No more stress lines from worrying about what people think, no more migraines from jealousy and rage, no more stomach upset from fear and discontent! And just as He promised, if you humble yourself- He will lift you up.

Things I Wish I’d Known: How to Tithe

This blog begins a series of articles that I have entitled “Things I Wish I’d Known “. This will be a whole lot of random topics that I feel many women are not educated on today for a myriad of different reasons. Whether you want to blame the school system, toxic feminism, ignorance, or sheer laziness, children and teens are not being taught essential Christian life skills. Well, it’s never too late to catch up. I hope that you will find these articles prove useful to you, and motivate you to teach your own children.

Today’s topic: tithing.

We just had Missions Sunday at our church, and while the emphasis was on missions (obviously), the preacher also mentioned tithing. Did you know that less than 25% percent of Christians tithe? If even half of your church started tithing biblically, your church could double its impact! Wow! So let’s start today’s lesson.

Tithing is a Commandment

Tithing was practiced before the law by Abraham and Jacob, under the law by the Israelites, and after the law by Christians. The word tithe literally means the tenth part, reinforced by Jacob’s promise to give God the tenth part of everything he gained. A couple key chapters for tithing would be Genesis 14, Genesis 28, Leviticus 27, Malachi 3, I Corinthians 9, II Corinthians 8-9, and Hebrews 7. It is important to note that while Jesus never specifically commanded His disciples to tithe, He also never told them NOT to tithe. It is not unreasonable to assume that God, Who is the same yesterday, today, and forever, would expect tithe of His people today; nor is it unreasonable for Him to ask of us a mere 1/10 of our income.

2. Tithing is a Necessity.

Without the tithe of the people, the ministers cannot work as they should. This is covered in the the key chapters mentioned above. The work of the Lord must be financed by someone, and it is rational that that someone should be us. Sometimes church members take it for granted that the electricity is on and the rent is payed, that the bus has fuel and the pastor got his paycheck- but that money has to come from somewhere. God has a plan to take care of His church, and that plan is for Christians to tithe. Too many churches are going into debt and closing their doors because we are disobedient in the area of tithing!

3. Tithing is Not a License to Sin.

Jesus made it very clear to the Pharisees in Luke 11 that being super careful about tithe and neglecting the rest of God’s commandments is hypocritical. Obedience to one commandment will not cancel out disobedience to another. It may soothe your conscience, but that’s about all. I know of so-called Christians who will mail in their tithe every month, but will never darken the doorstep of the church themselves. God doesn’t take bribes, and will not be fooled by your replacing repentance with money.

4. Tithing is done by Choice.

Tithing is not to be mandated by the church, the state, or anyone else. This is made clear in II Corinthians 9:7. However, you should not have to be conjoled or forced into it, because it should be something you do freely and cheerfully. What an honor to be allowed to take part in the Lord’s work! But it is your choice. This is why most pastors don’t look at giving records, and why we don’t have accountability partners for giving. It is between you and God- but then again, who is a better accountability partner than Him?

Ok, now we have decided that we will tithe. How do we start? I’m glad you asked!

Get out your paystub.

Look at your paystub (physical or online version), and see the total amount you made this pay period. Write down that amount. For example, your number might be $1,230.57.

2. Get out your calculator.

Actually, you probably won’t even need the calculator for this one. Just move the decimal point to the left one space. Round to the nearest dollar. Using our example, your amount would be $123. If using the calculator, multiply the original number by .10. In either situation, the final answer is your tithe.

3. Get out your checkbook.

Now make out a check or go withdraw cash for the amount, and put it in the offering plate at church either every pay period or combine to tithe once a month. Simple, right?

Now for some frequently asked questions.

Q: If I tithe, how will I be able to make ends meet?

A: The Lord blesses those who obey Him. You may have to cut out unnecessary items from your spending (new clothes, expensive coffee, dinner out every night), but I never have met anyone who could honestly say that the Lord didn’t provide for them when they were faithful to Him and careful with their money.

Q: Should I tithe on my tax return?

A: If you tithe on your gross income (your income before taxes are taken out), then no. You already payed tithe on it. If you tithe on your net income (after taxes are taken out), then yes.

Q: Should I tithe on gifts?

A: You should tithe on gifts if they are in money form. For instance, I tithe on cash and gift cards, but I don’t try to figure out how much the bar of chocolate from Valentine’s cost and tithe on that. If you receive a very expensive gift and know its value, I would pray about it and maybe ask your pastor.

Q: Are tithing and giving the same thing?

A: No. Tithe is the mandated amount of 10% required of all Christians. Giving is an amount over the tithe that a Christian gives based on what God has given him/her in love and gratitude.

Hope this was helpful!

-Beth

Having Fun with Boring Stuff

One of the challenges of being an adult is learning to tolerate things you just don’t like. You know, when your husband drags you to a football game (yawn), or your child wants to play Mommy-is-a-Robot for two hours (scream), or maybe your best friend wants to watch the newest Hallmark movie…again (sigh). Now none of these things are wicked or harmful…but you just don’t like them. Now what?

You have three choices: refuse to do the thing, do the thing unwillingly, or do the thing with a joyful attitude.

Clearly, you (and everyone else) will enjoy the activity more if you are happy about it. You can infuse life and joy into a situation that otherwise you would have breathed discontent and unhappiness into. You might not think so, but you have the ability to bring down the spirits of everyone around you. Your attitude is a very powerful thing.

But how?

1. Don’t lie about your preference.

I truly hope you do not take this post to mean that you should fake liking something so that everyone else feels better, because this is not my intention. If you have a genuine issue with something (it’s sinful, harmful, bad example), state your argument and withdraw if necessary. Most of the time, though, that isn’t the reason. Usually, we get upset simply because we do not get our way. Having said that, it is not wrong to have preferences. If you don’t like spinach, it is OK to avoid the spinach casserole at the church potluck. If you don’t like bowling, it is OK to suggest another activity. But please don’t sit around complaining about it! If you are asked your preference, and are then overruled by the leader/majority- deal with it. This is not 1st grade where we throw tantrums because we didn’t get the purple glue in art class!

2. Think about why you dislike “it”.

So you were overruled, and you have to do “the thing”. Before we can proceed to learning to enjoy it, we must discover why you DON’T enjoy it. Judge yourself. Do you dislike ice-skating because you don’t want to embarrass yourself falling? (pride) Do you hate having company over because you are afraid they will find fault with you? (insecurity) Do you dislike football because your husband spends time watching it instead of being with you? (jealousy) There are a million possible scenarios here, but it all boils down to this: why is it a problem? You may find it as simple a reason as your childhood friends laughed at you while skating, or as complicated as reason as your dad watching football before he abused you- but whatever the reason, it must be addressed. Pray about it, and ask God to show you how to deal with it. If it is serious enough of an issue, seek counsel: but do NOT hide your problem under “I just don’t like doing that.”

3. Realize you probably won’t be the best.

So hopefully, by this point, you have figured out why you don’t like “it”, and dealt with the root issue. Now we are ready to try “it” with an open mind…but, wait.

I’m not as good at this as _____. You can fill in the blank. Example: My husband loves to go bowling, but I have a chronic wrist problem that makes it painful to bowl with my dominant hand. Once I have conquered the fear of pain/embarrassment, I go bowling and quickly realize… that I am horrible. Forced to bowl left-handed, I always score the lowest (even with the rails up;). What now? I can make all sorts of excuses, play the pity-me card, refuse to bowl, and make my husband feel guilty for bringing me in the first place- or I can choose to be happy with my score. I can choose to accept the fact that I will never be as good as he is (he was in a bowling league in high school), and just enjoy the game and the company. I can choose to laugh at every gutter ball I throw, and I can act like I won the Olympics when I hit a pin. So can you. You can choose to be happy with your best. Comparing yourself to the best player/best cook/best singer will not help anyone, least of all yourself. Take joy from your small victories, not unhappiness from your small failures.

4. Have fun.

At this point, you are in a good mood. You might not be particularly interested in what is going on, but you are happy to be involved. Now let’s take it to the next level. Don’t just tolerate, enjoy! Laugh at the corny jokes, and tell some of your own. Build a house of blocks, and knock it down yourself. Play Monopoly and make up some special family rules that involve tickling and ice cream. Cherish the time you have with your friends and family. Your involvement in their favorite thing may mean the world to them. Make the impression even better by making joy-filled, loving memories. You may even find that you start to like “it”! Could it really hurt that much to try?

Good luck!

-Beth